Matchmaker, Matchmaker.. Leave Me Alone

When I tell people my older sister just got married, they often say "Now the pressure’s on you!”

Can someone please tell me who exactly is applying this pressure?  (Besides all of the people who say this to me)  I assume they are implying that my family is.  And I’m just wondering why anyone thinks that would be?  In the past, the bride’s family would provide for the woman until she found a husband.  Then they would throw a wedding, give a dowry, and the woman would, in turn, be taken care of by the man for the rest of her life.  Given this cycle, it makes sense that a woman’s family would encourage her to get married, so as to rid themselves of the emotional and financial burden of having a daughter.  

But now, the woman is, often times, already providing for herself, and still the bride’s family will sometimes spend a small fortune on a wedding, and then the woman continues to provide for herself, either independently or jointly with her husband.  So really, it’s financially illogical for my family to want me to get married.  

Okay. So... who is telling me “the pressure’s on”?  Middle-aged men.  That’s who.  And, very occasionally, middle-aged women.  No young people, and no elderly people.  What’s going on, Baby Boomers?  Why are you the only ones dwelling in some modern-day version of Fiddler on the Roof?  Do you think my family is going to provide for me until they find a nice butcher to marry me off to, and finally be rid of me forever?  

Get with the times!  Because it’s 2015, and marriage or no marriage, my family will never be rid of me.  

That’s right, Baby Boomers. You followed the secure path, gave us everything, and now you’re stuck with us forever.  So enough talk of this pressure to get married.  Because you are the reason the pressure is 100% off.  And for that, I thank you.  

Love Love Love,

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  1. As someone soon to be entering middle age I take umbrage at this. Not only have I not pressured you, you're one of the few women I haven't proposed to this month.

  2. That settles it then. We're enrolling you in mathcamp.